I have to tell you that if I had known what I know now when I was younger… and I know, we always say that… I swear I would have taken better care of myself. But, and there is always a but(t) in any situation… some things just can’t be changed. Genetics play such a large role in our lives that you would think that we would pay better attention when we are young. We always think that this or that will never happen to us and go along our merry ways oblivious to the obvious.
I have noticed a few things now that I have hit that stage where the kids are embarrased by you and the men stop taking that second look. Yes, I am now old enough to have received several AARP offers… sigh. They go in the trash for now but someday I will take a more serious look. I have reached that milestone and hit my brakes a little too late and went across that white line for pedestrians. My roman numerals start with “L” and it isn’t pleasant in so many ways. I thought I would take a few moments to share with you the not so nice things of going over “L”.
1. The most action I get these days is when I sneeze and then the moment is instantly ruined by realizing that I most likely just pee’d my pants.
2. I am past the stage of thinking it is cute that someone just called me “ma’am”.
3. I panick after brushing my hair when there seems to be wayyyyy too many hairs in that brush.
4. With my complexion and blonde body hair, now “wild hair” hunting is a game that I play at least once a week. (God forbid that one has grown too close to my eyes… it is a pain in the ass to try to pull those out!)
5. I have start plucking grey hair out… of my eyebrows! Oh! You know how older men get long eyebrow hair? So do we! (I am not the only one that has this problem, right? Please say yes. Please?!?)
6. God forbid that I have to tinkle in the middle of the night. It takes forever to get coherent long enough to get up and go. I have literally fallen back asleep sitting on the side of my bed!
7. Clothes… my God, the clothes. I swore that when I was younger that no one would ever catch me in pants with elastic waist bands. Heh! Now I can’t live without them… and some lycra stretch in the pants legs and buttocks area is a plus!
8. I hate shopping for underwear now. I can’t go into that department without taking long, wistfull looks at the sexy, satiny undies. Then I end up sighing and head for the old lady section, hoping that they have something satiny (with lycra!) at least. LOL!
9. I have lived with a bad case of TMJ most of my life. Now everything pops and creaks. And I thought it was embarrassing when I was younger to have someone hear my jaw pop…
10. Getting up off a low sitting couch has become something of a game. Can I, just this once, get up in one fluid, young-like movement? (God help me if I have to tinkle…)
Life sure does have a way of slapping us up side the head. Lord knows, I have had enough slaps lately… 
LOL…the getting older crap does, no pun intended, get old
It also occasionally causes trips down Memory Lane, which are and aren’t pleasant to behold. If you drop by the blog, go to the previous post to the current one; you’ll see what I mean.
Hang in there (and watch those low-riding couches at tinkle time).
Being barely on the left side of 40 and having pulled a few grey eyebrow hairs, I can relate. *sigh* Especially when I don’t have that many to spare! Ah well, a part of life it is. I’m still feeling in my early 30′s, except when my lower back screams, so I guess it’s ok. For now, at least. I’m just going to buckle down, get in better shape, dye my hair, and start usuing anti-aging cream! Keep smiling, but don’t chuckle if you have to tinkle!
Am sitting here trying not to pee my pants from laughter, and with tears running down my face…..cuz I been there – done that more times than I want to remember.
The older ya get, the harder it gets to find those ‘wild hairs’, get off couches, and get to the bathroom in time.
Have fun, my dear, while you can cuz it don’t get better…….
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