OK, we got our little insight, via Carlo, into the mind of the rare guy out there that views inner beauty just as attractive, if not more, as the outside can be. However (comma), here is a little tidbit for you guys out there that are trying to figure out the inner thoughts of the modern woman.
Sure we notice the outside parts and bits just as much as you do. A bright smile and a nice ass will turn a womans head quite quickly. A six-pack can make a woman weak in the knees. BUT, what can turn our knees to jelly and set us to quivering is a man that is not afraid to talk to her. A real man shows his emotions and doesn’t hold it all in. Yes, this is probably the opposite of what your fathers taught you, but hey!, it works.
For some reason men have this idea that they have to work out their problems in silence and I can tell you from a personal stand point it drives us batty. You don’t have to appear all macho in the privacy of a personal conversation by keeping your silence. Yes, some women can be overly talkative and expect their partners to be the same way. Sometimes this characteristic can drive men to silence. I don’t blame those poor souls. But there are more of us out there that are not chatty Cathys and can listen when the time is necessary.
Talking out your problems does two things. It can release pent up emotions that could erupt in the wrong direction AND by talking things out with a loved one can give you a another perspective on the situation that you did not have before. By talking about it with a loved one you are giving her insight into things that she didn’t have before and you are sharing the load. Afterwards that load you have been carrying about becomes lighter. You find that you are not alone in your worry and perhaps a solution can be found, together.
This is an age old problem that has broken apart many relationships. Non-communication is probably the key reason most marriages and unions fall apart. The highest gift you can give your partner is yourself, in all ways, not just the procreation and stability part. I have broached this subject in the past and I will keep on bringing it up. Don’t let your problems become too heavy to carry… share the burden and make your partner happy at the same time.
Try it and you might be surprised at the new closeness in your relationships…
AMEN!!! ENUF SAID.
Well, now, I may be the wrong person to comment, since I do enjoy a good conversatioon (just ask Poenix and Gidget), but I do want to say that open communication would save so much headache, heartache and hassle. But, who am I to say, I have too many failed marriages to be taken seriously.
Carlo, failed marriages teach us lessons. Didn’t you learn from each one? Sometimes we forget to keep that open communication from one marriage to another, but as we go along..we learn.
Will you make those mistakes again? Probably not.
I too have had many marriages…..and learned from them…and applied lessons. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t.
Get married for the right reasons.
While I will say there are times I do bite my tongue and don’t speak out, it does help to let it all out. The good, the bad, and the worries. Share what’s on your mind, because no one is a mind reader. I’ve been known to needle push and prod a man until he finally spills
What can I say, I cannot leave things alone. My final words before the outfall are usually “I’m not a mind reader, TELL ME.” Keep those communication lines open.
most of the time….
“Failed relationships teach us lessons”.
Yep, they shore do. Granted, not all of us learn the same lessons, but lessons there are in failure.
Take the lesson I learned from my ex-fiancee, now many moons ago: when I’d sit and patiently listen to her blow off steam, I was accused of being patronizing or being indifferent; when I’d offer solutions, she’d accuse me of talking and not listening.
My learned lesson: no more engagements (or anythang else) with someone like that!
Great post, and it works both ways. I’ve been known (in past relationships) to hold things in, not speak my mind. Now I talk all the time (to myself)!