His Phoenix

Not so sure…

Posted on May 12, 2011 by phoenix69

that the new job is going to work out in my favor. So far, I am running in the negative thanks to 4.00 a gallon gasoline and 70-100 miles a night run distance. We shall see once I get paid if I will keep it or run for the hills. On top of this, I am getting no sleep and everyone in the house is staying a bit on the grumpy side… since they have been graciously helping me… and getting no sleep either.

I don’t work “for” the newspaper… I am a contract carrier and as such, I can use whomever I please to help run the route. To get done faster, we have been splitting the route and both of my men have been working it. The boy reads directions and box numbers out to the Hubs and they run one side of the expressway and I run the other. Their side is mostly right off the road… and mine runs out in the boonies… and partially into another county. I found subdivisions that I had no idea existed and I have lived here for the last 15 years. Several are the mega dollar hoods… with mansions and the mini me versions right along side them.

Temps have been in the 90′s and with us being extremely broke… we have not turned on the air yet. UGH… have you ever tried to sleep while your skin slowly roasts? I know sweating is good for the body to get rid of toxins… and I swear I must be running on pure blood… cuz the only time I am not sweating is when I am out in the cool night air running papers.

I am hoping that something breaks in a good way in the money dept soon… so the worries will let up on these tired old shoulders. Not sure how much more stress this old body can take.

Hopefully next time I will have something more positive to convey to my one reader… (Hey Sally!)

Til then… hasta manana

Posted in Life | Tagged hot, newspapers, sleepy | 6 Comments

Time flies and then some…

Posted on May 5, 2011 by phoenix69

I don’t know if anyone still reads or even checks in over here. Had to clean out cobwebs, a lot of dust (cough) and a few critters of the spammy variety before I decided to post just for shits and giggles.

Many changes have occurred for this dragon/phoenix and as usual, I have had to rise from my own ashes in the process.

Loss of friends along the way has dealt me a major blow, mentally and physically. My heart just doesn’t beat right these days because of a major gaping hole that is there, and it is of my own doing. I don’t think I will ever be right again until 1. I get a chance to make it right or 2. I get hard-hearted and stop caring so much about it (and I don’t see that happening in this lifetime).

I will always love and care for this person. I will always be here for this person whether I am wanted or not. I will always answer if they should ever have the want or need. And I am ready to kneel and tell them that I am sorry. My pride went out the window long ago and there is much to beg forgiveness for. I was wrong and I know it. Instead of telling you be happy and bask in the glow for as long as you can, I got mean and hateful. True friends do not do those things… intentionally. But still no excuse, even though this was truly not my intention. It was not until after the bomb fell, and the smoke cleared, that I realized what an ass I really was.

I will be posting again regularly, even if no one ever reads it, because I really need a friend… even if it is imaginary in this ghost town of a blog.

Until next time… be kind and think twice before you say or type something you will regret later.

A tired and very dusty old bird.